A lot is made about how good it is to keep fighting and "Even if you fail it's okay as long as you give 110% everyday" and that's great and all but it's a problem as well.
Yes you should try and the message to not give up and to keep trying is a good one, but there needs to be a dialogue about this flip side.
It's also okay to know when to stop.
It's okay to take a day off.
It's okay to sleep in, to skip a day of studying because you're sick and you need to recuperate, to skip a day at the gym because you're tired to have a piece of cake because you're sad.
It's okay to just have a break. Hell it's okay to give up if what you've been trying for turns out not to be what you want.
So much is made of how much you work that when you find that you HAVE to stop and recuperate or take a break instead of enjoying the break and relaxing you're so consumed with guilt that the good it should have done is negated. Then because you still don't have the energy you take another day or whatever and the guilt is doubled and the benefit less.
We need to remind ourselves and each other that no one can be fighting or trying or working or studying all the time. We all need to rest and recuperate and we need to allow each other and ourselves that that's okay.
It's actually the same with mood. No one can be happy all of the time, sometimes we get fed up and we need a moan or a cry or whatever and that is okay. We no one is positive all of the time and we shouldn't try to be. It's not healthy. It's like couple who say they never fight, I kind of side-eye them because if you're in a relationship the chances are you piss off your partner and they piss you off occasionally but if you can't hash it out it only builds.
My husband and I rarely have big fights but they few we've had have been resolved fairly quickly because we worked it out. I remember saying to him early on and I would rather he say something to me as soon as it started bothering him rather then letting it fester. It's actually gotten to the point that if something has been allowed to fester when we do bring it up we start it with "This is partly my fault, I should have said something the first time." and we work it out. Usually when we fight it's over small things but it's healthy to have it out.
It's okay to be sad, it's okay to be frustrated it's okay to give up a project you no longer enjoy, it's okay to take a break and it's okay to rest. We're human, not machines.
Yes you should try and the message to not give up and to keep trying is a good one, but there needs to be a dialogue about this flip side.
It's also okay to know when to stop.
It's okay to take a day off.
It's okay to sleep in, to skip a day of studying because you're sick and you need to recuperate, to skip a day at the gym because you're tired to have a piece of cake because you're sad.
It's okay to just have a break. Hell it's okay to give up if what you've been trying for turns out not to be what you want.
So much is made of how much you work that when you find that you HAVE to stop and recuperate or take a break instead of enjoying the break and relaxing you're so consumed with guilt that the good it should have done is negated. Then because you still don't have the energy you take another day or whatever and the guilt is doubled and the benefit less.
We need to remind ourselves and each other that no one can be fighting or trying or working or studying all the time. We all need to rest and recuperate and we need to allow each other and ourselves that that's okay.
It's actually the same with mood. No one can be happy all of the time, sometimes we get fed up and we need a moan or a cry or whatever and that is okay. We no one is positive all of the time and we shouldn't try to be. It's not healthy. It's like couple who say they never fight, I kind of side-eye them because if you're in a relationship the chances are you piss off your partner and they piss you off occasionally but if you can't hash it out it only builds.
My husband and I rarely have big fights but they few we've had have been resolved fairly quickly because we worked it out. I remember saying to him early on and I would rather he say something to me as soon as it started bothering him rather then letting it fester. It's actually gotten to the point that if something has been allowed to fester when we do bring it up we start it with "This is partly my fault, I should have said something the first time." and we work it out. Usually when we fight it's over small things but it's healthy to have it out.
It's okay to be sad, it's okay to be frustrated it's okay to give up a project you no longer enjoy, it's okay to take a break and it's okay to rest. We're human, not machines.
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